Happy Thanksgiving

So, tomorrow is Thanksgiving Day. One of the few days of the year that is considered a holiday where just about everyone closes their doors for atleast a few hours and many get a long four day weekend intended to spend time with family. One of the few holidays that is NOT BEEN COMMERCIALIZED. Heck, one could say that it might even be overlooked compared to some other holidays.

I am no history buff but I believe what I remembered back from the 4th grade is it had something to do with the pilgrims (plymouth colonists as they were also known) sharing thanks with some of their Indian friends for surviving their long journey to the New World back in 1621. And they had a feast. I also think it became a American Holiday during President's Lincoln's tenure. Although, Franklin Roosevelt tried hard to bring it to the economic forefront and tie it to the all mighty dollar by moving it up a week to allow for more CHRISTMAS shopping... and we do HAVE BLACK FRIDAY, most, however, still hold to the old tradition of just spending time with family and to give thanks. This is where my post is heading.

As a child, I must confess, Christmas was my ALL time favorite holiday. I mean GIFTS baby. We made cookies! And we had a tradition in my house, we had chinese for Christmas Eve dinner, sang christmas carols, watched A Wonderful Life or A Christmas Carol and got to open ONE gift before we went to bed. We always left cookies and milk out for Santa and carrots for the reindeer. Christmas morning was always about opening gifts, a excellent breakfast and then to the stockings. It is one tradition in my family, 34 years that is still STRONG and has well, to my recollection never wavered. I still end up at my parents Christmas Eve and wake up where I was brough up Christmas morning with my boys!! Okay, sorry, cause I really hate it when people rush Christmas and we hadn't had Thanksgiving and here I am doing it. Oh well, I digress.

As I have gotten older it hasn't changed... December 25th is still my favorite holiday but Thanksgiving is a close second... maybe even 1A. I mean this is the only holiday where people don't worry about bringing anything but themselves. You are expected to just enjoy yourself, enjoy the company, eat as much as you want and not feel guilty if you fall asleep. And if your like my family, football is on. You don't have to watch it but it's there...

As a youngster we always went to my Nana's and Papa's because that is where everyone gathered. I mean if it was Thanksgiving then you were there, that simple. It was like that until my grandmother passed away. I miss that... don't get me wrong, I still see family and we still have a good time, it's just not the same. This year, it will be just my wife and my boys... well, we might be at my parents but it depends on a few things.

Bottom line. Thanksgiving is a day to just spend time with your family... so everyone enjoy your day off, your family and be glad for all those you are able to share it with.

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!!

R.I.P

So Saturday was a rainy, sad, day.

I attended a comittal service for my sister-in-law Kaite who passed in January at the very young age of 30. You know, I just don't get these things. When I was younger, I was dead set against going to any funeral. I missed my Grandfathers. I was 11. I was like, how can anyone tell me this is how it is, people die. They would say, "He is in good hands with God. It will be okay." Yeah, well, God is doing a real sucky job of making me feel better right now. For years, I was like how can God take away the people that I love.

As I got older, in my late teens and early 20's I started to accept that people do die and it's going to happen to everyone someday. Although, doesn't mean I am any more okay with it then I was when I was 11. I remember being asked by my grandmother to attend my uncle Bud's funeral. So, I did. I swallowed my selfish opinions and feelings for her. And boy, did I HATE every minute of it!! People would say, you should go to these things out of respect for the ones who are mourning. Truth be told, I have a harder time than anyone will ever know with seeing someone after they pass. I always prefer to remember them laughing and smiling. And unfortunately, seeing them after they pass hangs with me and I cannot ever get that image out of my head and for me, it's like a nightmare that just won't go away.

My Grandmother on my Mom's side was the first ever wake I ever went too, I was 26... and the first time where I actually could not control my feelings. I would sit there and just start crying. I would try so hard to hold back but I physically couldn't it. I was a pallbearer for her funeral and when I put my hand on the casket, I felt as if she was holding my hand. I really cannot explain it... I miss her terribly. And you know, I always want to talk about her when I am with family but I don't.

Okay, this was not intended to be a blog about every funeral I went too... but it kind of just happened. I just don't get it. At the commital service, they asked that we get a rock they were passing around and to write something on it that reminded us of her... um, that just seemed selfish to me. How does writing on a rock that you thought she was fun or a good friend or sister do anything for her. Maybe it does something for us but not her. My rock said, "Your Burdens are no more. R.I.P"

Yeah, I have been told a million times that I am selfish for thinking what I do and I need to show respect and it's part of life.

You know what... if you think that of me then you don't know me very well. I treasure my family and friends more than I could ever possibly explain to someone.

Katie, I love you and I miss you!!

Why do we let life get in the way?

I was talking to my mother the other night and she said as she often does, "No one at work is going to care when you leave." I say that often as well. My mom recently said to me. "Why do we let life get in the way?" Another question I ponder quite frequently, more at times than others. This is my topic for today.

What is so important in our everyday life that we seem to do so much less of the things that really make us happy, whole even? I, like most individuals spend 8-9 hours a day of my most productive waking hours working. Why? Well, I suppose it has become a necessity to live the American Dream. I mean no one else is going to put food on my table, a roof over my head. Okay, so that is not entirely true. I mean I could go on wellfare, get food stamps and get subsidized housing. Heck, I could even get unemployment if I really, really wanted too. Trust me, there are people who do it because they can. And there are others who would do anything to get off it. This is no way a shot at anyone... this is just me, thinking... okay, writing out loud. The reality is I have a fantastic family and as for my first 20 years, my family did do all of this for me and I will be forever grateful. However, now, at 34 I am too DAMN proud to accept these things. I suppose I get that from my family too.

Okay, so work is definitely one of those things that occupies the better part of our time. If you have kids, well, then we know where a lot of the rest of your time goes: diapers, feedings, making dinner, lunches, breakfast, helping them get their clothes, reminding them not to forget their homework, taking them to their friends houses, to practice, to games. Your days are endlessly chaulked full.

What about weekends? Can't you squeeze in a phone call here to someone that was on your mind? Maybe at the store pick up that small something that reminds you of someone and send it there way. Yeah, but then you got to make the post office before it closes... oh and your still at work. I know they have extended hours now but now its a rush to do everything. You know what, that rush that you put yourself through just to make that extra trip or make that quick call can hang onto someone who appreciates it more than you will ever know. My grandmother was all about that... never, ever forgot my birthday, always had that something special for me just because I was on her mind. I am pretty sure this is where my Mom gets it. Again, I would be wrong not to say that I am very lucky as a person for the family I have because others I keep dear to my heart do the same but I know as me, I long to be like and well, I come up short, pretty frequently. I have great intentions. Ask my wife. I come up with ideas that I am going to do this, I am going to do that and well, I never get around to it.

Something always seem to get in my way. I have friends that I have not seen in months, family that I use to see every year in well over five years and that is because of a wedding or a funeral... the only true times we tend to carve out a piece of our time for someone else. Why? Why is this? Why can I not take that 10 minutes a day and write a letter? Make a phone call? Wrap a present and bring it to the post office just because? I can and I am going to try so much harder, starting today.

I am going to apologize right now for something that has been on my mind for a while... I am sorry to my god daughter Sara for missing out on so many things and not calling you on your birthday and settling for an e-mail. Yeah, I have my own family and things going on but you know what? I accepted being your God Father a long time ago when I was younger and I often feel I have come up short. I am sorry for this and I want you to know how much I love you!! My brother has been great in this respect and I am very glad I was able to make your graduation from high school.

Okay, bottom line, we let life get in the way because we chose to!! Yes, we all make choices and no one is ever perfect or right for that matter but doesn't mean I can't make sure I make those small things matter becasue I can and I am going to try damn hard to do so from this point on. I have a lot of time to make up for.

Simple

It has been a while since I last blogged. For that, my faithful followers I apologize. I have been a bit pre-occupied with a number of other things. However, right now, I digress to what I have been thinking about for a while now: simple. More importantly, a simple life. No, I am not referring to the television show starring Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie.



I am refering back to sometime... the early 80's, heck maybe even back to the 50's. Now, I cannot speak first hand about anything prior to the early 80's as I was not old enough to comprehend anything that may have transpired as I was but a wee young lad. Rather, I can only tell you what I wish: a simpler life.



I remember when Sundays were, well, a day of rest and relaxation. No, I am not talking about religion. I am talking about when all the stores were closed, gas stations weren't open for business. Sundays were a day for families to be together. Mom and Dad didn't work, there were no sporting events to take the kids to. The only time kids were taken somewhere by their parents was to go to Grandma's house, maybe church. Or maybe, just maybe they went on a family picnic to the park. Heck, is it so oft to think that they just stayed at home, worked on the house, played with the kids in the yard and made Sundaes in the kitchen before they all sat down to watch a family movie... didn't matter if it was Mary Poppins for the upteenth time, they were together and that is really all that mattered.



When's the last time you sat down at the table with whomever you are living with for dinner at a normal hour? No, 6:30 at night with you in the kitchen and your significant other in the livingroom watching the television doesn't count. I remember when dinner was a half hour after Dad got home from work, TV was off and Mom and Dad asked about or day at school. We all sat at the table and sat in our designated chairs. The table was set and we asked to be excused.

I don't know. I think there is a huge disconnect and although I do not have an insight... I am just trying to bring back the family togetherness... I wish the world would put some stock in that. No, greed has us working on Sunday for time and a half. There are sporting events scheduled Monday thru Sunday so kids get home as late as eight to sit down and eat... no time to digest for bed and we wonder why kids are getting more and more obese. They tell us to use credit cards because it's easier. What happened to lay-a-way? I remember vividly going to Zayre's and buying something for my mom in February and paying it off the week for Christmas but it was in cash and I owed nobody anything.

That's for another day...

OVERBOARD!!

The wind is picking up and white caps are forming on Lake Champlain.

"Maybe we should get closer to shore where the water is a bit calmer."

Everyone agrees and my Dad starts up the motor on the Pontoon boat we rented for the weekend for our fishing trip. We go about 20 Feet and it stalls. He turns the key and it sputters. I hope we're not out of gas I think as we came close the day before. My Dad leans over the back of the boat and looks and comes up with the fuel line. Ummm... that's not a good sign. My Dad pulls a MacGyver cutting the line where it split and jerry-rigs it to get us going again. We are on our way. The waves have gotten much larger and are pushing us around a little. Bam! we come down into a wave and I get soaked sitting in the front, kinda of similar to being on a log flume ride at Santa's Village. Everyone laughs. Bam! We are taking on water...

"Everyone to the back of the boat!!", My Dad yells.

"Tim, get the pole before it goes over!!"

I grab the pole and the engine cuts out. Oh oh!

"Get on the cell and call Butch!"

We call and tell the owner of where we are staying where we are and what has happened. In the mean time my Dad manages to get the boat going again... He does impress me with his instinctive survival skills.

We make it in safely.

Okay, so no one went overboard this past weekend but we came awfully close. We had a great time fishing even if we didn't catch any keepers. Well, my Dad caught two and my middle son caught one as well but my son is a ethical fisherman... we only catch and release as he feels for the fishes. That perturbs my Dad but as reluctant as he might have been internally, he obliged his grandson and let the fish go. My Dad gets the annual "King Fisherman" award for I believe the third consecutive year. This distinction goes to the person who catches the most fish and most keepers.

Me... well, they were calling me 'empty handed' as I came up empty more than anyone else except my 3 yr. old, my Mom and my Wife. My three year old doesn't count as he can't hold a fishing pole yet. My Mom only casts like two times and my wife... well, she is a newbie.

There were times I got a bit frustrated. I think after my Dad caught his 10th fish of the trip, he asked, "How ya doing over there, Josh?"

I replied, "Let's see, I have lost more than half my line on my brand spankin' new fishing pole, lost about 10 lures in the process, lost 3 fish trying to bring them into the boat, only person not to catch a fish on 'the guaranteed to catch a fish lure' and almost went overboard... I am having a hell of a time."

Although, all above was true... I did have a hell of the time. I think the highlight of the trip was going out with my oldest and my Dad before sunrise and watching the sun come up over the mountains onto the lake.

Can't wait 'till next year.

A Day at the Red Sox with my 9 yr. old.

"Wow! We're going to the Red Sox, Dad, Really?!" He says excitedly.

" I gotta get ready. I gotta get sunscreen. I gotta get my glove. I gotta get a Red Sox hat. I can't go to the game without a Red Sox hat!"

We jump in the car, with an 1 1/2 ride ahead of us and and a 30 minute T-ride. We get over the NH border headed to Fenway Park and the 9 year old says, "So, how much more time, Dad?"


" I say, about a 1/2 hour left to the T."


He replies, "A 1/2 hour... but you can drive faster cause were in Massachussetts, right?"


"Not exactly." I say.


"But it says [odometer] your going 80 and the speed limit is 65 in NH."


I take the foot off the pedal a tad.


We get to the T and my son looks up and says, "Do we have to take a bus? 'cause last time we had to take a bus. You remember, Dad? and it took forever to get to the park. I don't want to be late, I don't want to miss any of the game. Not one single picth. OK, Dad?"


"OK" I reply.


We park and go across a long enclosed bridge where once use to be a tram like vehicle. As we walk across he says, "Um, it sure makes a lot of noise. That doesn't make one very confident, dad."


"Walk in the middle, it makes less noise."


"That's better."


We goto the automatic T Fee based ticket dispensers. I type in two round trip tickets and enter my money and my change comes in the form of 12 Golden $1 coins. "Jackpot!" exclaims my 9 yr. old. We come to the entry doors and enter our tickets and the doors slide apart, just like the doors on The Jetsons. "That is soooo cool, Dad. Can I get a door like that for my room?"


"Probably not, but put it on your wish list for Christmas."


We make it to the park and I give my kid his ticket. As he grabs it we can here the PA Announcer name the starting lineups. "We're gonna be late, come on, Dad."


"We'll be fine." "Hey, let's goto the bathroom before we get our food and go up. Meet me at the mirror."


There he stands, waiting at the mirror like he's been there for hours. He locates me and gives me a big smile and the "come on, let's go" wave.


"So, you hungry?"


"I need a hot dog, dad. A soda would be good."


We make our way to the seats and sit down. It is absolutely beautiful out and Beckett's on the hill.


"Dad, look, there is Ellsbury in center!!, Youk is at first!, Pedroia at second! JD is in right and Jason is in Left. Is Varitek catching?"


"Yes."


First inning begins: it's 6-0.


He replies, "Wow, we're going to have a big rally, this could be like the Texas game, Dad."


Refering to the 19-17 bonanza a few days earlier.


It's 8-0. "Dad, what's wrong with Beckett?"


"They're (The Blue Jays) just having a real good day at the plate."


"All of them" He says.


"Hey, there's a new pitcher, Dad. Number 63. That's a good number."

Youkilis hits a home run... High fives all around. But my son is looking at me like it wasn't that cool. "What's wrong buddy?"


"Dad, everyone stood up and I couldn't see anything."


Hmm,. didn't think of that. It's now 9-4.


"Dad, I'm hungry."


Down to the concourse we go. "Okay, so, what do you want? Ice Cream? Fried Dough?"


"Fried Dough."


We go all the way down by home plate to get it because they give you butter, powdered sugar and cinnamon.


"Dad, I don't want Fried Dough."


"How come?" I ask.


"I don't feel so good."


"Do you want to go to look at the baseballs? We'll get you a souvenior?"


"ok"


We get to the stand.


"I want a Wally Ball."


I hand it to him after having paid.


"Thanks, Dad. "


After successfully scanning over the Wally charachter and gripping it and pretending to throw it, he says, "Dad, can you carry it?"


He looks uo at me and asks sheepishly, "Can we get Fried Dough? We can share it. I feel a little bit better but can we watch a little of the game on the TV?"


So we do. Lowrie hits a triple.


"Dad, we need to go back to our seats, the rally is happening without us."


To the seasts we go.
It's the 8th and Oki Doki comes out.


"Dad, Oki's pitching. And Coco is out in center. I like Coco. Coco and Crisp sound good together."


Sweet Caroline comes over the PA...


"Touching me, touching you... "

I give my kid a headlock.


My 9 yr. old waves in vein at Coco hoping for a wave. Coco looks up in our direction... but nothing.


It's now the 9th and Pap comes out...
And 4+ hours, the game is over, we lost 15-4. "Dad, we might be the jinx."


We're leaving and My son says, "Dad, that was awesome! Thanks."


As we get on the T he says, "Dad, I have been thinking: Unkie said, 'I might be the jinx if we lose.' I think its all the other people, that's our story, okay?"


"Okay" I say.

Commercials, who needs them?

Not me, that is for sure. I have never liked commercials with the exception of the Super Bowl Commericals. I actually looked forward to them more than the game unless my team or a team I liked was playing. I suppose the fact any company would be willing to spend $2.6 Million for a 30 second spot (price for a 2007 spot), you come to expect that it's going to be entertaining. My favorite of all time Super Bowl commercials was one put out by Nissan during the 1997 Super Bowl. You can view it here: Target Practice It was doublely satisfying as my team: The New England Patriots were playing The Green Bay Packers. However, recently, they just haven't lived up to all the hype. Although, the Dorito's commercial came close but other than that, it was a bust. The half-time show has gotten less and less desirable as well.

Anyhow, is it me or are commercials louder than the program which you want to watch is? I swear, no matter what I am watching when it goes to commerical I feel like the volume has spiked and my speakers on my TV are being tested everytime. So, I turn turn the volume down when the commercial, which I do not care about in the least is on and back up when my program resumes. This goes on a handful of times for each 1/2 program I watch. It really is ridiculous. I will say that TIVO has done a really good job of alleviating this. However, if I am watching something live... I have no choice.

Another extremely annoying thing about commercials is they have no boundaries. I suppose I have to hold the broadcasting companies to blame as well for this next irritation: The endless Cialis and Viagra commercials. I mean come on... if they want to show them that's fine but can we put a time restriction on, say after 8:30pm. If I have to field a question from my nine year old again about, why would you and what is a 4 hour errection, Dad? I won't be too happy.

Since I brought the broadcasting companies in... how about we lay off the language until say 8:30 as well. When my son hears "What a bitch?" as we are surfing channels looking for the next Avitar series, he doesn't have any context to even go with and may find it acceptable to call anyone a bitch until I tell him otherwise. And as hard as I try to monitor all that he does, I can't be everywhere all the time. Also, does ever sitcom have to have some sexual innuendo as part of its shtick? Don't get me wrong, I find some of them funny and I also am all for the first ammendment but again, these are shows that are on prime time.

This leads me into a whole other segment: Movie ratings. Remember in the good ol' days where we had G, PG, R and X. Well, now we have fallen prey to the PG-13 rating where you may have excessive violence and possible nudity and definitely a number of sexual connotations. I shouldn't have to watch every movie before my 9 and 13 year old to make sure it's suitable for their viewing. I would say the bulk number of movies are PG-13 for language, a lot of the times it's just not needed and the movie would not suffer. Violence, you say? Have you seen the violence in cartoons? I think most children know the difference between what's acceptable and not acceptable regarding violence. I never tried to fall off a cliff because Wile E. Coyote did. Why was PG-13 created anyhow? I am guessing to widen the audience. I mean back in the day PG was usually a kids movie and R was an adults movie. I miss the areas of black and white, you know what your getting yourself into days.

Another fall victim to the all mighty dollar rant.